Dear Past Me

Looking at the journalingprompts.com site for ideas, I came across one that stood out to me. Because it is so often on my mind, the prompt for the "Friday" section about listing who I was in the past compared to who I am now is something I can speak easily about.

I do give this quite a bit of thought, maybe because I want to "get to know my (old) self" or maybe because it is something I have not yet gotten over.

Who I am in the past is extremely different than who I am now. Especially as a child. But I think every child is different than their adult person.

My focus as an early-mid teenager was on school, mostly. Then after schooling was taken care of, my focus was on band. After band, it was of my friend Michael*. Michael and I were great friends, I looked up to him, he and I were best friends. Together, we had a focus on filming and learning about film production.
As we grew older, we naturally grew apart. His interests evolved to karate, card games, and acting immature. My interests remained in filming, movies, and observing. Not only did our interests influence our change of friendship, but the way Michael grew up to be-his attitude, his personality-was non-complimentary to mine.
To say the least, I was several years ahead of Michael in maturity.

I was a happy, sweet, caring person. As I grew older, the more rude, non loyal people I met, the more my heart grew bitter. The old me danced around, was happy, and responsible. I grew older and I became depressed. Not only because of this mental depression, but because of the hurt I had experienced in my life.

There are some things I miss about the old me, but there are some things about the new me that I am thankful for.

Coupons!

One of the prompts I have read suggested skimming through a magazine and picking a page that best jumps out and writing about it. So I took that suggestion and skimmed through a readily available magazine (OK! October 3, 2011 issue) and found an ad for a show called Extreme Couponing on TLC. It was the first page that popped out at me. First of all, all of the colorful coupons and the fact that a woman is peeking out from a pile of them - it's not something you see everyday! Second, the big bold letters of "The Crazy Couponers Are Back..." - Entertainment Weekly posted in the top left corner. I guess I like that type of font, because it stood out to me.
Ironically, I am into using coupons. But, I believe, there is a line between the extreme couponers and the occasion couponers. I would fall in between the two. I use coupons, I love coupons, but I do not go go "crazy couponers" on them. I believe that some coupons are great. And others I can do without.

For example, if a coupon is offering me $1 off an on-brand product, but the off-brand product of an almost-the-same product is at an original price of half of what the price would be of the on-brand (with the coupon)! In that instance, I wish that they had coupons for the off-brand. But I guess that the price of the off-brand products are already low and at a great value.

Some on-brand products are so great that it is worth using that coupon (or even paying full price), such as cheese. I am very picky about off brand cheese. But then other products such as trash bags, I feel that it is better to get the off-brand, where you pay less but get more. Win-Win!

Some women I see walking around the store and they are carrying a big binder with coupons inside baseball cards (great idea, by the way!) but are so dedicated on finding a few cents off that they spend hours in the store just buying a few items. Now that I think is ridiculous. The off-brand to me is the safe bet. If I cannot find an on-brand item in a good price range for me, I automatically go to the off-brand.

This big binder filled with coupons sits up on the top part of the cart, the woman is skimming through, looking for a great coupon to go with a product.

I have heard one case where this couponer, I guess maybe she started a trend?, went on a shopping trip and ended up spending cents on a huge list! I think that is great. But in order to be that type of shopper and get those results, you need a lot of time. And I mean a lot. You have to cut the coupons, keep them in order, throw out expired coupons, look for the best sale (doing research, calling, looking online). If you have the time, I think that is great. But for people that do not have the time, I don't think it is possible to have that low of a total.

One time I had a coupon for $4 off a great lady razor, which is usually priced at about $12. At Target that week, they were having a sale on that particular razor ( I can't remember exactly how much ) but I ended up paying only $2 for this razor! This extremely awesome, good razor that I had wanted for years (but was just recently being re-invented). I was so happy I was beaming and could not stop bragging about my great buy. This is one instance when a coupon really, really did great. Other times, combining coupons on a trip saved about $5 all-in-all, which is not bad!

It is those great "free" coupons that really get me happy! When I get a coupon for a free product, like chewing gum or soda, I am so happy. Who doesn't love free?!



September 29th, 2011

The Dreaded

Death does not always have to be physical. What other things can die or feel like a death?
- http://journalingprompts.com/#


I will always remember that feeling. The feeling of "losing" a role model-someone I looked up to. Realizing they weren't who I thought there were is what felt like death to me. Everything that I had known to like about the person (their values, their loyalty, their honesty) was all a lie. All the things they told me, all the things I thought they could be, and all of the respect I had for them vanished once I realized they were the exact opposite of who they seemed to be. That feeling was as if something was shutting down inside of me. Like a brick wall was blocking my thoughts and keeping me from going anywhere. That is what death of a role model felt like to me. Role models are important and with all of mine turning out to be the exact opposite of a role model, I felt that death quite a bit. But none of them hurt as those first few (or even that very first one).

An ending to a wonderful, feel good movie feels like death to me. If the movie is just right, where I feel there has been a real story line, plot, and the characters feel like family, then when the credits roll, it feels empty and hollow, and it feels like death of a story. Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants was a great example of this. The movie was so incredibly good. Feel good, the characters grew on me throughout the movie. And then came the ending. The big build up to the credits. The loud music you just know means the end. And that is when my heart began to ache. I could tell that the ending to this wonderful journey was about to end (the "death" of a story, if you will) and I felt lonely. I did not want this movie to end. And as the credits rolled, it took a lot of me not to cry. I wanted to cry. No, I wanted to rewind time and relive that movie over and over because it felt so good to watch it. And the stories that built up throughout the movie, the lovable characters, the stories that the movie told... they all died off with the credits. That was the end of those exact stories, those exact instances, and those exact plots. It was all over. It was a death of a great movie.

The same goes for a great book, too. Reading that book and getting so indepth and into that book, where it actually becomes like another life to you. When the book ends, that is like death. Death of a story, of substance of characters, and of the feeling you get when reading the book. As if you are in another world. A world filled with so much more than reality. Possibilities, friends, imagination. It all dies off when the book ends. And then it is hard to move on from that touching book. It is a time of "mourning" as you await to heal from ending the book.

That is what non-physical death feels like to me. I know what reality death feels like (to have lost someone). Who hasn't? But it's the feeling of losing another life, a world of freedom and possibilities that also hurts.

Love at First Sight

"Do you believe in love at first sight?"
-http://staff.esuhsd.org/danielle/english%20department%20lvillage/journals.html




I believe that love at first sight is something we all want to believe in, something that is written about, something that is sung about, and something that is thought about so often. Each generation takes this "love at first sight" and makes it into their own. In each generation, we make movies, songs, books, poems... all about love at first sight. "Love at first sight cause when I saw you for the first time I knew we were meant to be as one" is a lyric from a 90's song, I believe, that I heard when I was 12 years old. Why did I like this song? It wasn't because I believed in love at first sight (I was only twelve!) but because of the tempo and beat. As I have grown in 8 years, do I believe in first sight now? I honestly do not know the answer to that. I myself am not a romantic. I believe that romance is sweet and is great, but it is not something I think about all the time. However, I do hope that there is such thing as love at first sight for all the little girls out there wishing upon their beautiful wedding with the perfect man (such as my sister). I want to believe that something so magical and unscientific can occur.

But my logical side begs to differ that this is even possible. How do you fall in love with a person (not their looks) at first sight? You do not know this person, you do not know who they are as a person, their likes, their dislikes, their annoying habits, their favorite movie, their favorite song, and etc. When really, that is what makes a person fall in true love, is known who someone is on the inside, not the outside. Seeing someone is seeing who they are on the outside, their looks, their clothes, their hair. But knowing and falling in love with a person is feeling comfortable with the person, knowing what they think, knowing what they know and like, knowing who they truly and deeply are and feeling a connection above nothing else. True love is never wanting to leave this person, wanting to be with this person forever. True love is fluttered, racing heartbeats even after 5 years of knowing them. True love is realistically knowing that this person is the one that you want to spend the rest of your life with.

Have a ever felt love at first sight? No. But I have felt puppy love at first sight. I have felt " he is so cute " at first site. Have I ever been in love? I do not know. I honestly do not. I am still questioning this, myself.


September 27th, 2011.

Testing Time

I am walking a moderate speed, making my way to the testing center at 7:30 a.m. this morning. In my hand, I have got several sheets of blank, white notebook paper, two mechanical pencils, an eraser, and a scientific calculator. I am prepared for my math proctored exam. My flip-flops squeak as I stride past the library, past the students lounging in the hall, past the elevator. My rhythm of walking is a match for the beat of my heart.
Step, step, step. Squeak, squeak, squeak. Pound, pound, pound.
I now meet the stairs. A steep incline of stairs I climb. I reach the top and make my way past the computer lab on my right. The fluorescent lighting is gleaming off of the school's tiled floors and the breeze generated from my walk is lifting my hair slightly. I reach the end of the hall and glance to my right, then glance to my left. No sign of the testing center. I then realize that the testing center is on the ground level. I rotate around, retrace my footsteps back and make my way to the testing center. I finally find the testing center, where I will be taking my proctored assigned exam. A friendly staff member greets me at a desk, where I am to check in on a computer. I type in my student I.D., click the class I am testing for, and Log In. The friendly lady recites the instructions; she must have said these rules several times, for several different students. Yet, she says them to me in a nice and polite way. I am handed the two-paged test, make a bee-line to the nearest seat, and readily begin the test. Throughout the test, I erase multiple times, use my calculator several times. I am finally finished with this much anticipated test. I turn it into a new staff member; she is just as nice as the first one, maybe a few years younger. I am pleased with my test and feel positive that I did well on it. I am also in a happy mood to have been treated so well at the school. The trip for my proctored exam was a good one!


September 26th, 2011

Spring Fever

"What five images paint a perfect picture of a perfect spring day to you? Put those five images together in a piece of writing."
-writingfix.com

Five images that paint a perfect picture of a perfect spring day to me are:
1) sunshine
2) blue skies
3) green grass
4) flowers
5) slight breeze blowing


As I walk through the open pathway leading to a park, the sun is bathing me in warmness and comfort, as well as reflecting off of the fluffy, white clouds. Blue sky is my view for today, creating a relaxed feeling inside of myself. The wind is slight and blowing through my hair, filtering through the green grass on the ground, and providing a great temperature for playing outdoors. Throughout the luscious, bright green grass are flowers of all sorts. Short, stumpy flowers and tall ones, too. The colors of the flowers color the view of the grass. This is the perfect spring day. The weather is gorgeous. The feeling in the air is relaxed. Families are having a picnic off in the distance, where laughter is heard and sight of children running around chasing one another. Dogs are walking their owners through paved paths in the park, barking and tails wagging excitedly. Birds are chirping a beautiful song, accompanied by the sound of water flowing and falling into a small duck-filled pond.

Writer's Workbench

Both times that I attempted to submit my post in the Writer's Workbench DB, it said "error", so I am posting my response here.


To be honest, I only read two of the tools underneath the "nuts & bolts" menu to the left. I did not complete either of the workshops provided, however I did find some useful information in the two tools that I did read. The two tools I read were "Branch to the right" and "Use strong verbs".
"Branch to the right" was a tool about setting up the sentence so that the verb and the subject are at/near the beginning. This did make the writing more interesting, I noticed in the examples given.

The second tool, "use strong verbs", was the tool that stood out the most to me. It was really cool how changing a simple sentence to using present verbs changed how interesting the sentence was. Also, this type of writing I am familiar with. In the interviews in magazines I read, the writing is structured using present-tense verbs, which, I feel, makes reading the piece more interesting, but also more personal. Using that type of writing entraps me and makes me feel as though I am there in the interview, too.

I only read those two tools, but that does not mean I am not planning on going back to read a few more, or the rest of the tools, because out of just the two I read, I have some new and different insight on how to go about writing a more attention grabbing essay; I plan on trying to put these tools to use on one of my next essays.

Wrinkled Hands

They say looking at someone's hands will tell how old they are. Their hands will be a "story book" of their life, each wrinkle telling a story. Small, purple bruises can indicate old age while soft, smooth skin can indicate youth.

My hands give false information.

By first glance of my hands, my age could be assumed as late 20's, early 30's; by looking at my knuckles, I could be late 30's. My hands present smoothness, but my knuckles are the liars. With many, many small lines and puffiness, my knuckles look almost twice my age. My hands have always been on the older side.

So, in my case, a person can't always judge another one's age by only the hands alone.

How did my hands get to be so old? Was it often times that I cracked my knuckles, the cold winter months that dried my hands, or washing them often? Or maybe the sunburns that left my hands burnt to crisps (just another reason sunscreen is important!).

Needless to say, I do not like the look of my hands all the time. I am in no way saying that older age is ugly, because it is not (and so many people have proven this). But rather it is the puffiness and stiffness of my hands that gets me upset. Not only do my hands look older, but feel older too.



September 22nd, 2011

Goodbye Summer

All around, fall is making it's presence in the slightly chilly breeze, the smell of trees, and the colorful leaves falling onto the ground from high above. The hot summer sun is becoming a warm autumn sun; the bright summer days are turning into the tinted fall evenings. Ads of summer swimsuits, vacations, and camping are being replaced by back-to-school ads, coupons, and sales.

Goodbye summer, once again, until next year. Goodbye to flip-flops and shorts; hello to boots and sweaters.
Coats replace the tank tops, scarves for the sunglasses. The smell of school supplies linger in the store isles and winter merchandise is slowly taking over the area where the paper notebooks, binders, pens, and pencils once were.

There is a moment when it is obvious that summer has ended. To me, this year, that moment was a couple of weeks ago when the temperature one day was very hot and humid, and the next was cold, dreary and chilly. Winter is creeping up on us; it is time for my hibernation (if only!).

Hot cocoa is in the hands of fellow passerby's, taking place of summer lemonade and tea. Soups are now the season staple, leaving behind ice-cream.

Fire places are now the center for entertainment for fall/winter, unlike the pool for summer.

September. The perfect month for representing "back to school"; in turn, it represents fall. It goes hand-in-hand.

So this is my farewell to Summer 2011. Goodbye. I will miss you as dreaded Winter makes it's way to the city.



September 20th, 2011
(edited to add date)

Journaling

As I am continuing with this assignment, I have noticed that to "journal" means much more than just writing down how I feel, what I see, and what day it is. Journaling can mean to delve into literature and language, write personally about experiences and how it relates to the present, opinions on hot topics, and stories. Journaling can be colorful, full of imagination and creativity, and can paint a world of possibilities.

With all that said, I think that this assignment is a very smart, and fun, idea. This assignment might provide students with the opportunities to obviously better their fluency, but to also learn a little about themselves, their writing style/technique, and to get a more in depth perspective on English.

With so much to journal about, I do not see why more people don't journal. Journaling is to make thoughts materialistic and real; to journal brings what is in the mind to life on paper. Thoughts become of substance, an idea that you can hold in my own hands. Stories and dreams can be written down and not forgotten or left behind. Journals can be beautiful and personal. Notes, lyrics, poems, drawings, recipes, names and addresses, and so much more.

I have always liked journals and the many I get as gifts each year. It wasn't until a few years ago that journaling on paper became important to me, and for a while, I was journaling every week, sometimes multiple times in one day.

September 19th, 2011.

In Store

"Why do you shop there? Think of a store where you occasionally shop. Can you write a piece that uses all five senses to describe the essence of this store?"


I walk into a big building named Wal-Mart. The lights high above are bright and florescent, casting a dull light onto objects and people inside the store; reflecting off of the white, speckled floor tiles. The smell of perfumes mixed with bananas fills my nostrils. And another scent I cannot put my finger on- a scent only associated with Wal-Mart-of a professional office cubical, maybe. I hear a mixture of sounds that follow me through the isles, of kids laughing, of mothers mothering, and of shoes hitting the ground as people shop. Another sense, touch, is represented through the items I feel, that I put into my cart, that I pick up but then put back down, deciding I shouldn't buy. And then there is the testing stage of the trip which only happens once every few visits. This latest testing stage included my approval over Kleenex Brand Tissue Paper, newly formulated with nose-soothing technology. I must say, it did soothe my nose and it was quite frankly soft and silk-like. Tasting is another sense I can point out about Wal-Mart. Subway hides in the corner of the store, but the aromas drag you in. The taste of my always-the-same grilled chicken breast with cheddar cheese, black olives, tomatoes, lettuce, pickles, and sweet onion sauce drizzled delightfully over the concoction is always pleasant and never dull. The sweet onion sauce compliments the grilled chicken breast very nicely. The crispy pickles are sweet and tart at the same time. And the lettuce adds that final crunch that makes the sandwich whole.

These senses combined make Wal-Mart, well, Wal-Mart. It is one of the familiarities that I have grown to like when shopping at this store, and maybe why I continue to come back on an almost weekly basis.

So Bored

"Is boredom a state of mind? Write about a kid--perhaps yourself--trying very hard not to be bored."
-Writingfix.com


Many times as a kid I would find myself waiting for something: a ride, my mother, the bus. Sometimes I would wait a couple of minutes and other times I would wait an hour or more. I like to think I became an expert on beating boredom. How, you ask? Twiddling my thumbs, for one. Reading. But one thing that I always did, never got tired of, and passed the time for me, even as a teenager... observing other people. May sound a bit creepy, but it wasn't, I promise. I would try and think of life stories to fit the person I was people watching. A young lady who aspired to be an actress, and older lady with a long list of life stories. And sometimes when I would observe others, I couldn't help but feel a small attachment to a few. A friendly mother figure who looked warm and sweet, an elderly couple who looked so nice and inviting.
I could spend a lot of time just pondering life's meanings, who people were, people's meanings and who I was as a person on this Earth.
Or, maybe I would sing a song, making up my own lyrics to the tune of a good song I had stuck in my head that week. Or maybe I would space out just enjoying the alone time.


September 17th, 2011

Family

How could anyone take me serious when I say that family is the most important thing when I hardly communicate with mine? That was a question that popped into my head today while out in the drizzling rain and chilly night. And I actually have an answer for that.
Without getting too personal, I will just say that growing up, I learned what not to do. I learned that I was the black sheep of the family from a very young age. I learned that family meant more to me than to my siblings, cousins, aunt, uncle, and grandparents from the get-go.
It is a sad truth. And I am still the black sheep of the family. Family still means a lot to me. But being "dis-owned" by several family members kind of took its toll on me. Over a fight that my sister did not try to understand my side, she got mad and said I was no longer her sister. Pretty harsh words, huh?
I truly and honestly wish that either 1) my siblings were more loving, thoughtful, caring and considerate or 2) that I had siblings that were all of the above and more. Very, very rarely has my brother and sister shown love towards/for me in my life. And very, extremely rarely have they shown any kind of caring-ness towards anyone without expecting something in return.

It makes me sad. Because while I noticed other girls my age would have older sisters who were protective and loving over their younger sister, I did not have that. Instead, I had a sister who left our home at age 14 to live with my grandmother who provided a little more than my mom could. After my sister left, I did not see much of her. She didn't call to ask how my brother and I were, she did not email, mail, or visit to see if we even existed anymore. She only cared about our grandmother and herself, herself being #1 (and still is to this day).

My brother is no different. Every-single-time my brother has ever contacted me, it has been because he wanted something. Anything he has ever done for me has been for his benefit. No "I-Love-You's" from either.

This is all very hurtful, even writing this. All I wanted was a caring and loving family, but was dealt the exact opposite. Family members intentionally hurting others, pill abuse.


I feel I've gotten too personal. I think I will edit this and post something else.

Soap Opera Drama

September 16th, 2011
(edited because I forgot the date)

"Why do we watch them? Make fun of soap operas with a piece of writing."
-Writingfix.com


At the same time as laughing at how dramatic and silly the soaps can be, I am a little intrigued, to be honest. Why am I laughing at dramatic-ness of the soap? Well, because it seems a bit much. It seems like some of the soaps out there can mimic high school with all the drama they instil. When I want to watch a T.V. Show, I don't want to be caught up in some drama that takes a whole season to settle. It just is not my mindless-T.V. type of show. Don't get me wrong: sometimes, the soaps can be fascinating. "Wow, look at how much lip gloss they managed to put on her lips" or "who in real life dresses up so fancy just to go get a coffee?"- at least.. I don't.
Some of the stories presented on the soap operas are interesting to me, but I don't find the time to catch each and every episode for weeks just to find out the end of what spiked my interest in the first place (I will never know what happened to the lady who was stuck inside a coffin, I believe it was).

My mom, on the other hand, loves soap operas and used to watch them every single day. So maybe I should ask her what ever happened to the lady in the coffin? Maybe she would know.

Ocean

"How did it affect you? Tell about the first time you remember seeing the ocean or an amazing forest."
-writingfix.com



The first time I saw the ocean was when I was 15 years old. My mother and I had visited Florida (I believe Tampa Bay, to be exact) for the very first time - how exciting! And it was. We had won this trip on the radio contest so this was free for us.
The first morning there, I snuck out while my mom was still asleep and I crept outside to see the ocean for the first time and it was magnificent; words cannot describe how amazing it was. The ocean was big and beautiful and so relaxing (just thinking of it is making me miss it). I remember actually feeling the trees and thinking " wow, real palm trees" (hey, I had never seen one in person before!).

The ocean had it's distinct smell to it, and once mistake I took a gulp of the water and my word it is salty. More than any type of accidentally swallowed lake water I've ever had! The two nights there, my mom and I walked along the ocean and just relaxed. It was very nice. The moon and the ocean - I felt I was in a movie or something. It all was so relaxing. I would swim and my mom would watch from the shore. I was wary not to go in too far since I had no idea how close those sharks (my fear) might be!

Seeing the ocean is so... so wonderful. I wish everyone could experience it and it's beauty. I can see why people fall in love with the ocean. In all this time, I still have not forgotten how old I was, what month is was (January) and that my mom and I loved spending time outside there.

Looking out onto the ocean was endless. It kinda scared me, seeing all that water and imagining that there were probably ships out there. Knowing that there were sharks out there!!
It is just so great and scary and beautiful all at the same time.

That was the only time I have seen the ocean in person but I hope it certainly is not the last.

Algebra

September 14th, 2011

As I am sitting here trying to do my Beg. Algebra, I feel I am going insane.
I just do not understand this math. I have been trying my hardest to get it, yet am still falling behind. What am I doing wrong?
Is this one of my stressors? Yes, it is. Very much so. Why? Because I do not get it, and when I think I finally do understand it, my homework tells me I did it wrong.
Mixtures, word problems. These are getting me, they are stumping me, at this time.

I cannot believe how difficult this is for me. I am beginning to wonder if I am being placed in a class that is too high for me now. It wasn't several years ago, but that was when I was fresh out of school and still had some of this information stored in my mind. Now that I have been without using these tools and information, I feel I am in the dark completely. And I see that I am the only student in my class that is asking questions about the current section that we are on (and the section that I am having the hardest time with)!
Am I the only student finding this section to be excruciatingly difficult?!

I Believe Credo

I believe

that being a parent is the hardest job that there is. From being a first time parent, not having

any background knowledge or experience, entering into a world filled with diapers, spit up,

tantrums all the way to dating, school, and the dreaded "talk", it is all a learned skill, to parent.

Reading books, articles, and talking with other parents can help, but ultimately, it is experience

above all that you learn and grow from.

the doubt that lingers in the back of your head is awful, wondering if you are doing the right

thing, if your children will "hate" you, how can I make sure to give my child the best? When all

you really and truly want is to see their happiness.

I believe that being a parent is not a 40-hour-a-week job, but a job that is all day, all night,

every day and every night, until the child is a grown 18-year-old. And I believe that this

constant job can put a strain on any relationship due to the abundant stress the job entails.

I also believe that parenting is also the most rewarding job that there is. Seeing that

beautiful child you created smile lights up your life.

Know Your Audience

Know Your Audience Analysis

I believe my audience as a whole is playful ("do some boxing with kangaroos" said Caylan Marsh) and very self assured (several classmates said that if given the chance to switch places with anyone else, they would choose to stay who they are- I think that's very cool!), and that my audience is imaginative (questions of genies, dreams, and being shrunk down to miniature sizes and answers of traveling the globe, having a clone, and dreaming of becoming a cowboy).

I believe my audience is touching (wanting to turn back time to say sorry to a deceased mother) and with several different and broad answers, I believe my audience is smart, thoughtful, and that they would love to debate if this class were a seated class.
Opinionated answers of religion and why it is a topic not highly talked about bring me to believe that once given the opportunity, my classmates would like to open up and state their beliefs if we were a face-to-face class.

I think that with this analysis I have of our class, I will be keeping all of my assumptions in the back of my mind while writing. Who will I be writing for? What might keep them entertained throughout my paper? What will grab their attention and yank them into my paper so they will want to read it? I will be targeting my audience on a personal level (several people spoke of seeing the world, so why not have an attention grabber that focuses the senses on a beautiful, foreign place?) as well as an educational level.

In the audience answers and questions, I expected each question to be different, as it was a requirement. However, what was not expected was the personal answers given (such as the one of the deceased mother).

Free Writing Reflection

520 words in 10 minutes. That is not bad. But they are not organized words, they are jumbled (I guess that's why they call it a free-writing, eh?).

Free writing used to be one of my favorite processes and so helpful to me. Because all the thoughts swimming through my mind, and doing a free write to get them out. It was very helpful.

This I Believe Free Writing

I believe "12) that movies are my escape from reality"

When I watch a movie, I completely wrap (?) myself into the movie... I completely shut off the world around me and become apart of this two hour movie I am watching. And this is especially true when I am at a movie theater and I am surrounded by blackness, but watching this big, wide screen infront of me that is playing a movie that I was wanting to see for so long. I become intangled to this movie. The characters are my friends, the main character or whoever stands out to me is me and such. I take in all of that movie: the surroundings of the characters, the sounds, the music, the camera angles, the plot, the names, the acting - are the actors good? or are they acting like they are acting.??? An actor must be acting persuasively.. and for me that is really getting into that roll. they have to make this role their own. their emotions must be intact with their character. what facial expressions would the character do? when body movements would the character do? what look in the eye, does it make me feel and believe that you are the character or that you just came off of the street and are filming a short 2 week film just to make a movie to make money. you must be passionate!

Looked at my timer... 5 minutes and I lost complete track of my first initial thought. I am sitting in the theater, the Campbell to be exact, and am sitting in a isolated, yet not too-far-away from anyone location... and I am watching this movie. I am so estatic that I finally get to see this awaited movie, and ready for this "ride"... the movie starts and I squeal... "here we gooooo!!!!" and we're off. I eat my Mike N Ikes and drink my used to be Sprite but sometimes Cherry Pepsi. and I sit there in my chair, leaned back at just the right, most precisely comfortable position to enable my most pleasurable experience and I am watching this screen and getting into everything on it. the opening credits with the bouncy feel good music and the text flying by and the build up to a great or maybe not ride. sometimes I am so focused on just the story and not of the details like the characters names, and such. but sometimes that doesnt matter and then sometimes it does... like when one character is refrencing another by their name and all i can think is "who is __!??!? why didnt I remember who was ___?" but that is ok. its not the names that make this story a story.. it is the feeling the music the camera angels and such the graphics the lighting the colors the scenes oh boy is it the scenes the beautiful places and such. Ok have 30 seconds left to say that being in the movie theater is completely one of the best things to me and I wish I could go once a month!

This I Believe

I believe...

1) that being a parent is the hardest job out there
2) that being a parent is also the most rewarding
3) that winter comes too fast
4) that there aren't so many good people out there
5) that encountering many mean, selfish, and un-loyal people has made me believe in good people a little less than I used to
6) that college is harder than high school
7) that juggling college and life is hard, too
8) that blogs are fun
9) that writing in the blog is fun
10) that books are usually better than the movies
11) that movies are one of the best things ever invented
12) that movies are my escape from reality
13) that Winter is so lonely and depressing
14) that Spring and Fall don't stick around long enough
15) that ice cream tastes so good
16) that cake is yummy and great with the ice cream
17) that Hiland Dairy's Birthday Cake Icecream is a perfect combination of both and now I want some!
18) that families need to be loyal, caring, loving, and there for each other
19) that my family issues have caused some personal problems deep down for me
20) that dogs are wonderful creatures
21) that cats are mean
22) that black is a good "all around" color
23) that I don't know completely who I am as a person
24) that those "Nick and Norah" type nights (with endless nights with friends and music) are so worth being tired in the morning!
25) that Coke-a-Cola is so addicting
26) that I am a great person sometimes
27) that I can be a mean person other times
28) that I miss who I used to be
29) that I miss how simple life was in grade school
30) that I have so much room for improvement
31) that I am beginning to run out of " I believes"
32) that everyone needs to be heard
33) that I need more friends
34) that the best type of family get-together is outside, cookout and music and laughing
35) that I am sad and need to cry but it's hard

Blogger Design

I really like the design options that Blogger gives for the layout. It makes it easy for anyone, even those that don't know HTML, to have a creative and unique blog. Now I see why many people have Blogger accounts.

I finally chose a design after going through about 3.
Some of the pictures that are given as background images are so pretty and creative and inspiring. I liked the notebook page one just as a fun one!